Did you ever just get stuck in days where everything feels off? I'm currently here. I'm down on everything, feel miserable, and just want to cry. In fact I have, a few times actually. It started a few weeks ago. I found a picture of myself from a few years ago and it literally stopped me in my tracks. I looked great and yet I remember thinking taking that picture that yea I guess I don't look that bad but definitely didn't think I looked good. Now looking back I would kill to be there again but instead I'm here, struggling to stay on track.
My issue isn't working out. I love exercise and have been pretty consistent getting workouts in 5-6 days a week. I love my crossfit box and I love my at home program. They both make me feel proud of myself and give me so much confidence. They both come with a great community that pushes and encourages me. But then I go to try on clothes that aren't gym clothes and I cry. Literally every time. I'm not comfortable, I don't feel good in my clothes and it is one of the worst feelings around. I am in the rut with my diet and I just can't stick with it. I have no excuse so please do not take this as me making excuses because I just don't have one. I know how to do it, am equipped to do it yet I don't do it.
I am currently starting a new macro program. It has been about a week and I guess it is going ok. As much as I want to lose weight I care more about feeling better in my own skin than the number on the scale. I just want to be able to be happy with how I feel, though I do know I need to lose weight.
I am going to continue blogging about this new macro journey in hopes that it motivates me as well as someone else. I can't imagine I'm the only one feeling this way and since I know what a terrible feeling it is I would love to try and help at least one other person to start to feel better. So as I sit here writing this, and crying, I know I want more for my health because I know I deserve it.